Fleshy Freeloaders

"Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."
Psalm 141:3 (NIV)

When King David wrote these words, he most likely was asking God's help in monitoring the words he was speaking out of his mouth. When I recite these words, I'm enlisting God's help monitoring me from the things that are going into my mouth. I've adopted this Scripture as one of my most important Dieting Commandments. I've relied on this Scripture time and time again to keep me on the straight and narrow path of weight management, which is not always easy in today's world of fast food and 30 minute delivery guarantees. Some days I experience more success than others.

As fall approaches, I find myself fingering my sweatpants with longing. I look forward to those cold days when my wardrobe will include layers of clothing to protect me against the elements. It's so much easier to camouflage one's food indiscretions under yards of fabric than it is in capri pants and tank tops. Once the temperatures dip below 75, look out! It's cold enough for me a, "desert dweller," to don the fleece!

Several decades ago when I lived in Alaska, we bandied about the expression, "Porking up for the winter." It was more a state of mind rather than a way of life. Although if memory serves me, the winter of 1980, I did actually manage to eat my weight in Oreo's. But then, I was with child, so that doesn't really count. Now that I'm the age that I am, however, I've noticed the "porking up" thing is no longer just a state of mind, but quickly becoming my harsh reality. Especially since I've been dating Menopause.

Recently, I can't seem to escape the feeling that I'm being followed. When I turn around, there's no one there. Only me. A lot more of me. For all these years that I've been commanding Satan to "get thee behind me," it appears as though he took me literally. I've got these little pudgy piggy-backers hanging over and under my bra straps now. I've never had those before! Dare I say it? Yes ... it's an attack of the dreaded back fat. It's like I have these little fleshy freeloaders following my every move. And it gets worse. The back fat is only the beginning. Did I mention the tushie tail gaters? And of course, the previously mentioned spare tire around my mid-section encircles the entire circumference of middle half. Front and back! Although, here's a practical tip. If you pull your pants up high enough you can actually stuff that extra epidermis under your waistband, thereby making it disappear entirely. Out of sight - out of mind.

Apparently there comes a time in every mature woman's life when regardless of how many miles are logged on the treadmill or how carefully calories, carbs or points are counted ... we all can expect a visit from fleshing freeloaders. To some it shows up as back fat or a tushie tail gater. For others, it's a toad sack under the chin, an apple belly or muffin tops in their "C" cups. What's a girl to do?

I know I'm long past the age when a wolf whistle will be directed my way. (Unless of course I'm golfing in Sun City. From a distance and with that age crowd ... I'm quite something!) It's only recently ... very recently ... that I've come to grips with the harsh reality that this is as good as I'm going to get. I will continue to work out until Jesus comes. And I will attempt to watch what I eat ... as best as I'm able. But life is only getting shorter for me. I don't want to keep obsessing over rock hard abs and buns of steel. It's just not in the cards for me. If I can make it through this last half of my life with a cholesterol level under 150 and 120/80 blood pressure - then life is good! I've heard it said, "Life Begins at 50," and "50 is the new 40." Well I say, bring it on, Father Time! By the time I reach 60, maybe that will be the new ... 30? With today's technology, who knows? Anything is possible!

Father God, thank you that I want to continue to be the best that I can be. Thank you that I don't take for granted the life you have blessed me with. I know this is the only body I'll ever have and really do want to take care of it as best I can. Help me to watch what's going into my mouth ... but more importantly, help me to guard the words that are coming out of my mouth. Help me to weigh and measure my words so as not to inflict harm. And help me always to edify and glorify my Lord and Savior.